Out of all the healing work that I have done on myself, one of the most life-changing practices was definitely becoming conscious of my own emotional wounds. Emotional wounds cut deep, and often, as I have witnessed with myself can become a core part of your identity. So much so, that you aren’t even aware that at the core of some of your negative behaviors and cycles lies pain from your unhealed emotional wounds. Although I have done a lot over the years and dealt with a lot of my issues, I feel like my healing journey officially started when I became aware of my inner wounds, and started consciously, and actively healing them, every day, little by little.
Healing emotional wounds is tough work, especially if you don’t know how or where to start. I know that on my journey, I stumbled a lot, especially because I didn’t realize that healing emotional wounds is a process, and not a one-time fix that will magically change my life. Today, I’m sharing with you the most helpful practices and realizations that helped me heal my emotional wounds:
Understand Your Emotional Wounds
Before you do any work, I think it is crucial to understand emotional wounds are not proof of weakness, unworthiness, or a reason to feel guilty. Even the most well-adjusted people have emotional wounds because they happen so early in your life. Emotional wounds happen in your childhood - and even what might seem to others, the dullest of events, can cause an emotional wound to a child.
When we are children, we don’t really have the know-how to handle and regulate our emotions. To be honest, even as an adult I struggle to do so myself sometimes! The inability to handle our emotions and regulate them as children leave an emotional wound, that we often suppress as a defense mechanism. Because this happens so early on in childhood, many of the emotional wounds we struggle with, become parts of our identity that say: “This event caused me pain, I must avoid it by any means necessary”, even well into adulthood, when you might already have the emotional maturity and tools to regulate your emotions.
I personally always thought that my inner wounds are something I should be ashamed of because to me they represented a sign of weakness. I often felt guilty for having them, and I subjected myself to very harsh self-judgment. However, once I understood the cause of emotional wounds, I broke off the shame cycle because, in the end, I wouldn’t judge a child for having emotions and fears, so, why should I judge the child me?
Becoming Aware Of Your Emotional Wounds
Emotional wounds sound like something that would be super obvious. But in reality, we dig them deep and hide them well by creating patterns around them. This is why a big part of the work is to become aware of your emotional wounds and to properly identify them.
One of the best ways to start identifying the issue is to watch how you react. Whenever you feel emotionally reactive, practice taking a few deep breaths and asking yourself: ‘Why am I feeling emotionally reactive? Where are all of these intense emotions coming from?’ Most of the time, the answer to this question will lead you on a path to uncovering your emotional wound. I strongly suggest that you journal these little insights and answers you give yourself. Once you see the pattern behind the behavior, all of these insights will help you uncover your emotional wounds.
Healing Your Emotional Wounds
When I started to uncover my emotional wounds I struggled a lot because every time I uncovered a wound I felt immense pain and sadness. However, don’t be scared, because feeling those stuck emotions and properly processing them is the only way to heal your emotional wounds. After all, when you disinfect a cut or a burn, you know that the momentary pain is better than the pain and suffering from the wound getting infected, right? It’s the same with emotional wounds - they will be uncomfortable and painful at first, but then a huge weight will be lifted from your soul.
One of the biggest issues I had, when I was healing my emotional wounds, was that often, I uncovered them, but I was unsure how to heal them. It was very frustrating to know why I am the way that I am, but also being unable to fundamentally change so that I can live a better, happier life.
Sometimes, doing the emotional healing you need can seem scary, and it can be because when you heal emotional wounds, you are actually changing a major part of your identity for the better. You are releasing the weight of having to protect yourself constantly, but even so, the change can feel sort of unnatural, even if it’s good for you.
I wholeheartedly recommend working with a Natural Blue Chalcedony Lotus Mala if you feel overwhelmed emotionally while healing. Blue Chalcedony is a beautiful, calm, healing crystal that will help you to regulate your emotions, restore inner balance, and constructively communicate your emotions with yourself and others. This is especially important when you feel scared, anxious, and worried about the new, beautiful change in your life. The Natural Blue Chalcedony Lotus Mala will help you to find your inner peace and harmony and soothe away your worries.
I hope that these tips will help you on your path to inner healing and that they will help you to uncover and heal your own emotional wounds! Let me know in the comments below, which tip helped you the most, and what was the one thing you wish you knew before you started your healing journey?